Olivia’s Healing Letters To A Girl Who Was Being Bullied

By Pamela J. Wells

Originally Published on 7-6-11 on Inspiring Stories That Touch The Heart

Olivia Gardner and her mother, Kathleen Gardner.

While in the 6th grade at Sinaloa Middle School in Novato, Olivia Gardner suffered an epileptic seizure in school one day. Upon seeing this, her classmates called her retard. From that day forward Olivia would suffer endless bullying from her classmates over a two year period and three different schools.

She was called names and was tormented while she walked in the hallways at school. When Olivia transferred to Hill Middle School, the bullying escalated with students going out of their way to torment her. They even created a web site on MySpace entitled “Olivia Haters.”

Olivia then transferred to a private school in Novato, Marin Christian Academy, and had been going well for close to a year; and then, Olivia and her mother, Kathleen Gardner, reached out to help one of Olivia’s classmates who told them that her parents were abusing her. An investigation was started by child protective services and then word got out about Olivia’s family being involved in reporting it.

Allegedly, the girl had changed her story, telling her classmates that Olivia was trying to break-up her family. That is when the rumors began to spread. Olivia began receiving numerous emails and phone calls with some students even showing their hatred for her by wearing plastic bracelets that said, “I Hate Olivia,” on them.

Olivia felt rejected by her peers wherever she went, no matter where she lived or what school she was in. She withdrew more and more with each incident. The cafeteria lady started letting her eat her lunch behind the counter and she would hide between classes in bathroom stalls, because she would get beat-up. She started having anxiety attacks. Her mother went to school officials, the children’s parents, and even the authorities, but got no help. Many of the parents of the bullies told her mother that, “they didn’t have time for it”; that “it was just typical middle school behavior.” No one seemed to care.

Her mother pulled her out of private school and started homeschooling her. Olivia contemplated committing suicide to end the pain and suffering that became the norm in her life. Fortunately, those thoughts and feeling all changed when in March 2007, complete strangers and sisters, Sarah (14 years old) and Emily Buder (17 years old), read her story in a local newspaper. The sisters felt the pain that she was going through and, feeling compassion for Olivia, they decided to take action.

Olivia Gardner (right), Sarah (center) and Emily Buder (left)
at the San Rafael Community Center. Chronicle photo by
Brant Ward. Credit: Brant Ward

They came up with “Olivia’s Letters,” a letter writing campaign in which they encouraged their peers to take a moment of their time to write letters to Olivia offering their support. They expressed their messages for hope, healing, and understanding; inspiring her and letting her “know that she was not alone and that she had reason to believe in herself again.” All letters were screened by the sisters before giving them to Olivia.

Olivia’s P.O. box began to overflow with letters from thousands of others from around the world offering their heartfelt support and encouragement; including others, from children to adults, who had experienced bullying firsthand. She found solace in those letters of hope and healing.

An expert and an author on issues that adolescents are affected by, Rosalind Wiseman, said that parents are not always aware that their child is being bullied and that children will not always confide in them when this is happening. Her advice is that the warning signs that parents need to watch for are: isolation, losing friends, the avoidance of social situations, changes in appetite, and making excuses in order “to avoid going to school.”

She also said that parents should have open conversations with their children about the way that other people treat them; that they should always feel safe and never feel threatened by or uncomfortable around anyone.

Olivia now says that, “there are a hundred good people out there for every bad person.”

If you would like to show your support for Olivia, you can write to her at:

Olivia’s Letters
c/o Janet Buder
293 Corte Madera Ave.
Mill Valley, California 94941

Copyright © 2011-2013 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Fear of Being Alone

Staying in a toxic relationship for fear of being alone is no different than choosing suffering over imaginary suffering.
~ Pamela J. Wells

We all breathe and exhale the same air, so how is it that some think that they are more superior to other life forms?

By Pamela J. Wells

Accepting all life, we know that we all breathe and exhale the same air. It is not contained and only available and given to a select few. The ego—our imagination—is full of notions, such as thinking that one is special and therefore more deserving than others or that one is inferior to others; yet, at the most basic level, each and every living being cannot live without oxygen. At all times, we are inhaling and exhaling the same air. It is the delusional mind that creates egoic fantasies to make up for perceived inadequacies.

Originally Published: February 2, 2012

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

 

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Quote

When you are 100% selfless, placing no expectations on others, no conditions, the wall of separation vanishes. 
~ Pamela J. Wells ~

Being Selfless

~ Pamela J. Wells

Image: Foter.com

Quote

Take a Break from the Spin Cycle of Life.  Bathe Your Being in Nature.  Soak Up Its Energy.  Marinate in the Miracle of Life.  
~Pamela J. Wells

Image: hummingbird-21-wings at Foter.com

Living A Simple Spiritual Life

By Pamela J. Wells

Living a spiritual life is simple. 

Living in awareness is simple. There’s nothing spectacular about it. Living a dramatic life, filled with mental and emotional attachments to notions, beliefs, opinions, labels, comparisons, constantly competing with everyone over everything, not able to have a conversation with anyone without bringing up some personal achievement or trying to get a one-upmanship over another person only creates unnecessary suffering.

Read Full Article On New Blog!

Please update your Bookmarks!

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved Image Copyright: BigStockPhoto.com

New Spiritual & Inspirational Page on Facebook!

Spiritual and inspirational articles, quotes, books, images and videos  that are uplifting, spiritual, inspiring, motivational and enlightening.

Your True Nature

by Pamela J. Wells

When your mind is silent, such as when you are meditating or when you are just being in nature, your pure awareness, your essence, is not obstructed by the constant dialogue of the chattering mind. That is when you can fully experience your true nature—your true Self—your essence—your spirit—pure awareness. Your essence cannot be seen with the eyes. It is pure Being. You are pure being.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved
Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

100% Self-Acceptance

By Pamela J. Wells

When you accept your Self 100%, living a peaceful and joyful life is possible. Non-acceptance of Self, even at the least bit, makes it impossible to live peacefully and joyfully. Anything that you continue to identify with from the past—you must let go of. If you have regrets over past decisions and choices that you made and action(s) that you took, you have to let them go. If you blame yourself for others decisions, choices, and actions, you have to stop blaming yourself. If you are holding onto resentment and bitterness towards others—you have to let it go. You cannot control other people. Accept that and you will be at peace.
Read Full Article On New Blog!
Please update your Bookmarks! Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved Image licensed under 123RF.com Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

Quote

Feel the love in your heart and hold onto it. The more you hold onto it the more at peace you will be.
~Pamela J. Wells

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Attachment Is Not Love

By Pamela J. Wells

When you become attached to someone, you lose your Self in them, and—at the same time—they either lose themselves in you or they start to back away from you. Eventually, their free spirit will feel like it has become suffocated, because they will have that heavy feeling of attachment weighing them down, like an anchor. 
Appearances are also deceiving. They can both appear to be in love and affectionate towards one another, especially in the beginning of the relationship; but, ultimately, if there is any form of attachment, it always leads to heartache and suffering. Claiming ownership of another living being is futile. The same goes for placing expectations on others. Expectations are attachments to outcomes that are in your favor. Attachment and attempts towards trying to control another comes from fear—fear of the other leaving and/or being unfaithful to you. 
The more you try to control another, the more powerless and fearful you become, and if you are stronger than the other person and use it to control them physically, this is physical and psychological abuse. It does not work either, because you are attempting to secure the attachment through physical force. Holding on tightly and squeezing someone—like you would a dove—only kills it, kills them, psychologically—and, unfortunately, in some cases, physically. 
When you go into a relationship, never become attached, never place expectations on the other person, and never put a timetable on the relationship, expecting that it will last forever. The relationship will either last a lifetime or it won’t. No one knows for certain. Your joy does not come from another person. It comes from within. Expecting someone else to make you happy or to bring you joy always ends in heartache and suffering. Two joyful, joy-filled, people who come together, have a better chance of lasting than when one or both are fearful and insecure.
Enjoy each moment, each day, regardless of whether you are with someone or not. The more joyful and peaceful you are when you are alone, the more joyful and peaceful your relationships will be.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

Quote

Happiness Is Fleeting. True Joy Comes From Within.
~Pamela J. Wells

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Daily Inspiration

Like a fresh flower waking up,  absorbing the sun as it begins to rise,  every day is a new day to start fresh,  energized and full of life,  uplifted and inspired,  the energy of the sun raises  you up for a new beginning. 
~Pamela J. Wells

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Daily Inspiration

You Are 100% Complete! No Attachments Needed or Necessary!
~Pamela J. Wells

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Quote

Your True Self is Spirit—Pure Awareness—Uncontaminated By the Dualistic Mind. 
~ Pamela J. Wells

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

What Is Spirituality?

By Pamela J. Wells

Spirituality is not “New Age,” nor is it a religion. Spirituality comes from the root word “Spirit.” Spirit is not limited by time and space—the body is. Spirit existed before language and thoughts were formed, before religion. To live a spiritual life is to live from spirit, from your true nature of peace and joy—and not from the egoic mind that creates separation, pain and suffering. 
Some other terms used to describe spirit include: pure awareness, pure consciousness, essence, pure being, self (the true self, not the egoic, imaginary “I” self that becomes attached to notions and things) and formless existence-consciousness.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

The Ego’s Workshop

By Pamela J. Wells

Ego is the imaginary ideas, notions and beliefs we have about ourselves. The mind churns out separation, pain and suffering through notions and beliefs. Attachments to them—judging, labeling oneself and others, fault-finding and comparing oneself to another is the ego at work in its imaginary workshop.
The egoic mind will find anything to argue with another person about. Peace does not come from the mind. It comes from pure awareness, which does not have the chattering mind running and analyzing things. Looking for fault in others, criticizing, and attempts at making another person wrong—fault finding—comes from the ego. You even see this in spiritual circles, fault finding or right fighters, who are coming from a place of an egoic state of consciousness. 
When you argue with another person, it doesn’t matter who started the argument. You are playing the egoic game when you engage in the argument. The person who is living from an egoic state of consciousness cannot even see what they are doing. They cannot see themselves, because they are focused outward—externally—trying to fill themselves up, trying to fill that emptiness, that feeling of not being good enough up, by stroking their ego. 
Never argue with delusional people, otherwise you will get sucked into the vortex of delusion.
People who live from an egoic state of consciousness have an egoic desire to criticize others and prove that they are right, which is all just imagination—notions. That feeling of being right gives them a superficial high. It is like egoic crack. It never fills them up. It is a temporary high, so they have to keep repeating their destructive and self-sabotaging behavior. Criticism separates people. It pushes people away. It does not come from the spirit. It is not the spiritual way.
When we live our lives from spirit—from pure awareness—we do not label, judge, or criticize others. Peace, awareness, love and joy does not fight, does not look to start a fight and does not become defensive. This is the job of the ego.
When someone is projecting a negative energy, a negative remark, even if it is in verbal self-defense, they are allowing their ego to take the driver’s seat. It is not about being right or wrong. That is ego land. A person will never experience their natural peace and joy if they are constantly projecting negativity and non-acceptance outward. We have to accept ourselves 100%. No one is superior nor inferior to another—to other life forms. 
Your True Self is Spirit—Pure Awareness—Uncontaminated By the Dualistic Mind.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Quote

People who live their life from their spirit and love from their heart find it impossible to hate another human being. 
~Pamela J. Wells

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

If You Focus On The Finger, You Will Miss The Moon

By Pamela J. Wells

However you realize your true Self, your true nature is irrelevant. There is no wrong way, right way to realize Self. The ego likes to attach itself to words, ideas, right, wrong, etc. Teachers and teachings are just fingers pointing at the moon. If someone (enlightened being, anyone) points you to your true Self, your true nature, pure awareness, pure consciousness, which is egoless, it doesn’t matter who the person is. It could be a “guru”, a child, a homeless person. Thich Nhat Hanh quoting the Buddha, "My teachings are a finger pointing to the moon. Do not get caught in thinking that the finger is the moon. It is because of the finger that you can see the moon." The ego likes to say what is the wrong way what is the right way. It is all the imagination. Words and concepts are not truth. At best, they can point to truth, but they are not truth. Language is limited. If you get too caught up in spiritual terminology, right/wrong, then you are still playing on the monkey bars of the mind.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

New URL Address for the "Selfless Being Blog"

Please Update Your Bookmarks for the Selfless Being Blog!

Here is the new blog address for that blog:

http://blog.selflessbeing.com/ 

Love & Acceptance

By Pamela J. Wells

The more you love, the more you openly embrace and accept others, unconditionally, the more you accept yourself—the more at peace you are inside, the more joyful you are, the more peaceful your relationships are, the more magnetic you are, the more you attract people to you, who enjoy being around you, who enjoy your presence.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Judgment Vs. Love & Acceptance

By Pamela J. Wells

When one judges another, they are judging what they see, a body, the way in which the person appears on the outside, to them—based upon their biases, faulty and false perceptions, their assumptions. They associate and attach certain labels with and to that person. They do not see the essence, the spirit, of the person, which cannot be seen with the eyes. 
Judgment comes from notions about people, about the world, about beliefs over this or that—from one’s perspective; and, in many instances, their perspective is tainted by other people’s perspectives, the perspective of a group of people, or what is considered the norm perspective of a society—the delusional perspective—that starts out, from it base, its foundation, unstable, faulty and, many times, completely false.  
When they hear someone say or see someone do something that goes against what they believe and think, or is what they perceive to be wrong, they get a superficial high from judging them, calling them names, attaching labels to them, gossiping about them—when they fail to remember or to know that their judgments are based upon their own faulty and false perceptions, notions and beliefs, not the other person. 
The essence of a person cannot be labeled. The superficial, delusional high from judgment temporarily takes that person’s mind off of their own problems, guilt, pain and suffering. Judgment does not fill them up; although they think it does. They are attempting to fill their ego up, which is not real. It is just notions. It is a futile attempt to fill the emptiness and feelings of lack and insecurity that they have inside due to their identification with the ego and wanting to feel valuable and worthy based upon some notion of what valuable and worthy is—looks like. 
Delusion is believing that some are superior and others are inferior, some are more valuable and others are not so valuable. When one views themselves as being inferior or faulty in some way, they are quick to judge others. Instead of going within and identifying their faulty and false perceptions and notions about themselves and others—and releasing them—they are turned outward, externally, judging and lashing out at others.
When someone makes a not-so-good choice in life—to judge them, call them names, attach labels to them, attempting to belittle them with one’s judgment—that kind of behavior says more about that person than the one that they are judging. Nobody is perfect, we all make good and not-so-good choices throughout our lifetime. It is delusional to think that one person never makes not-so-good choices and are therefore some imaginary superior being to everyone else. This delusional way of perceiving oneself and the world comes from seeing everyone as separate, instead of seeing everyone as being a part of the same life force that enables us to exist. It comes from the egoic state of consciousness, which is not even real. It is only as real as one believes in their notions about themselves and the world around them. Spirit, essence, awareness, love—does not judge anyone. Judgment comes from the dualistic mind and all of its notions. The more you judge, the more you push others away from you. The more you become isolated. 
The more you love, the more you openly embrace and accept others, unconditionally, the more you accept yourself—the more at peace you are inside, the more joyful you are, the more peaceful your relationships are, the more magnetic you are, the more you attract people to you, who enjoy being around, who enjoy your presence.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com
Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

Quote

Expand Your Universe. Expand Your Thoughts.
Expand Your Imagination. Be Open To The Possibilities.

~Pamela J. Wells~

Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Quote

"How People Treat You Is Their Karma; How You React Is Yours."

~ Wayne Dyer ~

Quote

The ego is an illusion, but the problem herein lies, when we believe that we are the ego. 

~ Pamela J. Wells ~

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

New Spiritual & Inspirational Community Page on Facebook

Visit the New Spiritual & Inspirational Community on Facebook for spiritual and inspirational articles, quotes, books, images and videos that are uplifting, spiritual, inspiring, motivational and enlightening.

Life Teachers & Conscious Awareness

By Pamela J. Wells

Your life teachers are everywhere and come in different manifestations. When you are open to learning from everyone—everyone that you see and hear is potentially your teacher—a child, someone who is homeless or is limited physically in what they can do, someone who looks and dresses differently than you, someone from a different culture or who has different beliefs than you, someone who is living in poverty. You can learn from All of Life—All Sentient Beings—All People and Animals—All of Nature—Bugs, Plants, Trees, and Flowers. Life becomes your teacher, instead of limiting your life learning experience to conditioned notions and beliefs, you live your life from its fullest potential. Your eyes are wide open. They are not squinting, allowing only what you think should be allowed into your consciousness.    You are also your teacher—you can learn more about yourself by becoming consciously aware of your thoughts, what you think and say to others and the actions that you take and do not take—and if you are unsure about what thoughts and beliefs are destructive to you and those who are around you—how you feel will not lie. When your negative emotions manifest themselves, they are waving a red flag at you, but you cannot see the flag, because you are swept away by your emotions. Instead of being on the shore and seeing the ocean of emotions, you are drowning in it.
You can start paying attention to how you feel on a regular basis. If you can lay your head down peacefully at night, all is well, but if you cannot, or if you find yourself getting upset, agitated, angry, anxious, or depressed—your thoughts drove you there and need to be examined. Figure out what it is, exactly, that is causing these negative feelings and emotions. What were you thinking prior to that emotion coming on? Sometimes you know immediately what it is and others times you will have to dig deeper.
Our tendency is to believe what we think and believe those thoughts to be real, when in reality, most of what we think is not based on reality. If you place a high value on what others think of you, if you have a picture in your mind of who you think you are, you place a high value on your identity, and are constantly comparing yourself to others—physically, materially, and socially—if you feel your value as a person is dependent upon some social “status,” if you place expectations on others, such as expecting them to change, to live up to your “standards,” if you have a need to control or manipulate others to do or behave the way that you want them to—you are actively contributing to your own unnecessary misery, pain and suffering—and you are projecting that pain and suffering onto others. The great thing is that—once you realize what you are doing, you can stop doing it. 
Some negative and destructive thought patterns and beliefs take time to break, especially when they are deeply ingrained and in our subconscious, like the roots of a tree, so it takes time and practice to release the hold those thought patterns have on you. It helps to put little notes in different places as reminders to be consciously aware, or mindful, of your thoughts and feelings. 
Meditation is wonderful. I highly recommend it. When you meditate and quiet your mind, you are able to feel your natural peace and joy that is within you. Meditation, such as sitting meditation, is great, but it is not enough—by itself, because when you are not meditating, when you are going about your daily affairs, you also have to be consciously aware of your thoughts and feelings as often as you can and are able to remember to. While most of our thoughts are unconscious, we can bring the light of awareness to them. The more frequently you are able to do this, the more natural it becomes, and the quicker you are able to catch yourself thinking negative thoughts before they turn into negative emotions. 
One thing that you can do is—when you catch yourself thinking something negative, say, “That’s not reality.” Or “I am not my thoughts.” When you do that, you begin to see how silly your habitual negative and self-sabotaging thoughts are and how they run on auto-pilot most of the time. Thich Nhat Hanh, Buddhist monk, has many wonderful books on mindfulness and meditation; for example, when you are walking, you can practice walking meditation—each step that you take, you are present in that step. Your mind is not off somewhere else. You are in the present moment, in the here and now. The unconscious chattering mind is a stress creator, so that is why you need to become mindful of each moment, each action, and the quiet and still peaceful presence.
Everyone can become mindful. You do not have to be a Buddhist monk or Buddhist to practice mindfulness. By being mindful, you are developing a life skill that does not interfere with whatever religious beliefs you might hold or non-beliefs. It is a way of life—a way of living. When you are mindful, you are not driven by your unconscious mind that is set on auto-pilot.
When you become mindful of everything that you do, in each moment, from moment-to-moment, and you are not off somewhere else in your mind, in the past—reliving it—filled with guilt or regret—or in the future—worrying about things you need to take care of or worrying about how your future is going to turn out—that mindfulness brings you to the present moment. When you are in the present moment, your mind is not unconsciously running its pre-recorded messages of the past and projecting them into the future. You are no longer living two lives—one, where your body is present and breathing in the here and now—while your other, imaginary life and egoic self, is being lived in your mind—where a movie is being played, filled with painful memories from the past and worries over the future, along with faulty and false ideas, notions, and beliefs—taking you away from the present moment. This is not to say you shouldn’t have any goals and that you should never plan for your future. You set your goals and take action now, but you don’t sit around dwelling on your goals or future.  An Openness To Life and Learning From All of Life’s Teachers, Being Consciously Aware of Your Thoughts and Mindful of the Present Moment, Living in the Present Moment, Allows Space For You To Feel Your Peaceful Presence and Joy, Radiating Outward From Within, Touching Everyone You Meet.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

Peace, Love, & Unity Shatters the Illusion of Separateness

~by Pamela J. Wells

Anything that does not involve love, peace, and unity in the world that we live in; in our hearts, thoughts, and our verbal expressions towards one another is an illusion that pulls us away from our true nature and drives us further towards separation and our false perceptions that only leads us to self-destruct. Add to that a group of people who come together with these false perceptions and you have pain, suffering and even worse war! As Mother Teresa once said, "I will never attend an anti-war rally. If you have a peace rally, invite me." Debates are for politicians! What is there to debate if you have peace and love in your heart for everyone?

Discrimination towards others originates from ego, competition, and separateness. Peace within yourself cannot come from discrimination, from ego. It only brings about distaste and dissatisfaction, which only has room for judgment. When we put others down, you will notice that one can find anything about another person to put down. It may be verbally or by our actions or inactions.

It can be about anything: another’s race, culture, gender, handicap, social class, that someone has a lower formal education than oneself, that one’s job doesn’t pay as much, making a comment about a person being ugly from ones perception of what is considered beautiful or ugly, or putting down someone who has a different religion than oneself or because they are not religious, so you believe that something is wrong with them, that they are not on the right path.

Judgment is a never-ending vicious cycle, that only takes the focus off of your insecurities and what you consider your faults instead of seeing beyond the illusion of separateness. Ego and competition with others creates a never-ending pursuit of seeing who can make it to the top the fastest, so the empty ego will feel fulfilled, which it never does, so the never-ending pursuit continues.

Remove the Mask of Ego & Separateness.

Labels that you put on others are labels that can be put on you.

Others can label and judge you because you are a different race than them, you have a different culture, you are in a lower social class, you have a lower education, you have a lower paying job, you are not physically beautiful in their eyes and from what they perceive as physically beautiful. These are only judgments that further divides people into separate categories. How can you only love some people and not others?

It all stems back from the ego that was learned as a child. Insecurity with oneself can feed the ego to look for something to discriminate against about others in order for oneself to feel less insecure. When this is a futile endeavor that does not fill you up, does not make you feel good or better, but that further divides you from others and leaves you empty inside.

You may get a false and superficial feeling that you feel better when actually your ego feels better. You are still empty inside. The ego is like a double edged sword. It not only hurts the other person, but it hurts you as well. Division from others does not fill your heart with joy or happiness or oneness. It sucks the love right out of your heart and feeds the ego, an illusion of worthiness and separateness.

Many times people like it when they are told that they have a big ego. They think that it validates their worthiness, their superiority over others, that it makes them important, and makes them stand out from others. It does make them stand out from others.

No one wants to be around someone who has a big ego. They either avoid the person or they try to compete with them by trying to prove how much better they are than the other person. They stand out from others not in a good way. They are alone and empty inside, craving attention, but they cannot find it.

Just being as nature is, as a flower is, and not judging everything and everyone brings about peace and unity.

Everyone should remove the mask of ego and have love and compassion for one another, especially those who are suffering, who are dying, or who are in poverty and take action, helping one another to no longer suffer, to no longer die when it is preventable, and to help others, so that they no longer have to live in poverty. You never know, you may find yourself suddenly homeless or worrying about how you are going to make it day by day, week by week, providing for your family.

We are all here together!

There is an abundance of food, money, and love here for everyone! What we all need is to share and have compassion and love for one another regardless of one’s race, culture, handicap, social class, belief or non-belief.

Let us all love one another; together with peace, love, and unity, we can shatter the illusion of separateness!

Originally Published January 6, 2011

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

WAYNE DYER - WISHES FULFILLED On PBS TODAY at 1:00PM (Central Time)

Go to PBS for TV Schedule in your area:http://www.pbs.org/tv_schedules/ 
Wayne Dyer Returns to PBS with Wishes Fulfilled!Posted on 2/27/12 at 5:08 pm by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer
Best-selling author, beloved spiritual teacher, and internationally renowned lecturer Dr. Wayne Dyer returns to PBS for his ninth public broadcasting presentation, WISHES FULFILLED. In this special, taped in Escondido, California on October 21, 2011, he once again offers an inspiring and motivational message to viewers. Based on his book Wishes Fulfilled: Mastering the Art of Manifesting (Hay House, March, 2012) WISHES FULFILLED presents Dr. Dyer’s main message: It is possible for every person to live an extraordinary life. What’s more, it is possible for every person to manifest their deepest desires — if they honor their inner divinity, consciously choose to live from their “Highest Self,” and practice the steps outlined in his presentation. DR. WAYNE DYER: WISHES FULFILLED is part of special programming premiering on PBS stations beginning March 3, 2012 (Check local listings at http://www.pbs.org/tvschedules/  ).
Using his trademark humor, Dr. Dyer introduces The Five Wishes Fulfilled Foundations, outlining a program for mastering the tools necessary for living a profoundly satisfying life. Viewers will learn how to use Imagination, Living from the End, Assuming the Feeling of the Wish Fulfilled, Attention, and the Last Five Minutes of Each Day to create new and astonishing thought patterns, while defeating unproductive and recurring habits.
As is his practice, Dr. Dyer introduces viewers to provocative and original thinkers, including New Thought philosophers and authors Neville Goddard and Uell S. Andersen. He also cites teachings from the Old and New Testaments, the “I Am” Discourses, and shares poetry from Emily Dickinson, William Blake and others.
Special guest Anita Moorjani shares the stage with Dr. Dyer for an emotional interview. Anita, the survivor of a Near Death Experience, shares her perceptions of that experience with Dr. Dyer. The program concludes with a deeply moving performance of “Amazing Grace” by the San Diego Children’s Choir.
Since his last PBS lecture special (Excuses Begone!), Dr. Dyer received a diagnosis of chronic lymphocytic leukemia. Today, he is enjoying good health and openly discusses his cancer diagnosis in this program.
Some of the key points that Dr. Dyer makes during the course of WISHES FULFILLED include the concept that “if you would like to accomplish something, you must first expect it of yourself.” He offers the poem “There’s A Hole in My Sidewalk,” which sets the stage — literally — for understanding the importance of going down a new street in life. And, to the delight of the audience, he proves that “we are not our bodies” by sharing a photo montage of himself — from infancy to the present!
With self-deprecating humor, Dr. Dyer explains how being listed as third on the “Most Spiritually Influential People” Internet list creates a funny battle of the ego. Humor also infuses his explanation of the power of the subconscious to control most of our thinking, when he demonstrates his knowledge of Morse code — learned 50 years earlier during his stint in the U.S. Navy.
He offers rules for developing a “healthy” imagination, and explains Neville Goddard’s quote: “A change of feeling is a change of destiny.” Dr. Dyer explains why the last five minutes of every day are the most important of your life, along with a powerful practice that can immediately be put to use before going to sleep. But his most affecting teaching is taken directly from the story of Moses in the Old Testament: how saying the words “I Am” creates a direct connection with one’s highest calling.
Dr. Dyer reminds viewers: “You can live and feel as if your future dreams are a present fact!” His belief in the power of every person to change his or her life, and live from the greatest possibilities, continues to keep PBS viewers absorbed and delighted by this marvelous teacher.
PBS special programming invites viewers to experience the worlds of science, history, nature and public affairs; hear diverse viewpoints; and take front-row seats to world-class drama and performances. Viewer contributions are an important source of funding, making PBS programs possible. PBS and public television stations offer all Americans from every walk of life the opportunity to explore new ideas and new worlds through television and online content.
About Wishes Fulfilled:http://www.drwaynedyer.com/news/view/wayne-dyer-returns-to-pbs-with-wishes-fulfilled 

Universal Love

By Pamela J. Wells

True love is universal and not personal. Becoming attached and dependent upon the personal idea or notion of love, what it is and what it looks like, which is formulated in the head, perpetuates the pain and suffering of the individual and the collective consciousness. 
To love all life and love your Self, the essence of life, is the ultimate love. 
True love is indiscriminate. There is no compartmentalization in the mind of who to love and who to hate. Love is like the ocean, pure and uncontaminated. Life flourishes in the ocean. Hate is like oil, it contaminates the ocean of love. It contaminates life. It contaminates all, including the hater and those they love. 
When You Free Your Mind, You Free Your Heart.


Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

Thoughts & Feelings of Being Inferior or Superior to Others

By Pamela J. Wells


Thoughts and feelings of being less than or more than, inferior or superior, are an illusion that the mind creates. The mind creates meaning out of the meaningless, value out of the valueless and when we think we are not meeting some standard of an idea or notion or that we are exceeding it, then we either feel bad about ourselves or we feel proud of ourselves. Either way, it is not real. It is just the imagination. When we believe things that are not real and attach our identity to them and allow this imaginary idea to determine our worthiness, how valuable we are, we create our own unnecessary pain and suffering. We are nothing more, nothing less. We are not an idea or a notion. When we accept ourselves 100%, without attaching anything extra to our being, we are at peace with ourselves and others. We are free and are not chained to ideas or notions.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved

Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.

Spirituality, Enlightenment & The Mind

By Pamela J. Wells

Nothing To Gain, Only Ideas To Lose
Spirituality and enlightenment is not about gaining anything, acquiring anything new. It is about losing all faulty and false thoughts, ideas, and perceptions about yourself and others, about the world around you, that have blocked you from your source, your natural peace and joy that is within you. It is about realizing our connection to one another, to life, to all living creatures, to the earth, sky and to the universe, to the stars and to other planets, and beyond, to other dimensions, from the physical to the spiritual dimension that we can see and cannot see with the naked eye.
Spiritual & Physical Body
To be spiritual does not mean to deny the body. You accept all that is. The problem is that the world places too much emphasis on the physical, so there is an imbalance. When there is an imbalance, we move further away from our true nature, peace and joy—and closer to our false self, the ego, where we create and project unnecessary pain and suffering onto ourselves and onto others.
Awareness Transcends Your Analytical Mind, Ideas & Notions
When we live from awareness, we transcend our analytical minds, which dissects everything, separates everything into opposites—duality (ugly/beautiful, right/wrong, good/bad), only creating more conflict, anger, and violence. Yet we are oblivious to what we are doing. Why? Because we were raised on ego, the imaginary idea we have about ourselves, which becomes our reality and truth in our mind, because we are so conditioned to think this way, with this mindset. What we are taught to value, especially in the West, is our “Status” in society, from a child on, we are taught to be better than others, compete, and win. If you do, you are valued in our society. You are valued in your family and by your friends. You are valuable. If you lose, you are a failure, a nobody. People will look down on you. This is the ultimate “Insanity” of our society, the delusion that our mind creates and that is perpetuated throughout our society. None of it is real. That is why we have to wake-up. 
We have to wake-up from delusion to what is real. As long as your mind is swept away, swimming and drowning in the ocean of ego and notions, you cannot see the ocean and what you are doing to yourself and to others. You have to save yourself, because society is not going to do it, because the majority of society is with you in the ocean, swept away, swimming and drowning in the ocean of ego and notions. Grabbing onto and attaching yourself to others who are drowning is just pulling you further under and deeper. You have to break away, to save yourself first, before you can even think about helping and saving someone else.

One great way to experience your natural state of—awareness—and start to see everything as it truly is—reality—is to ask yourself a question, “Is what I am thinking real or my imagination?” You could also ask yourself this question, “Is what I am thinking real or societies imagination?”
If you win a ribbon or a trophy, you should be proud of yourself. That is what we are told. The mind creates value out of nothing, out of things that are meaningless. Ascribing meaning to the meaningless, value to the valueless is what our mind creates. Awareness has no value, it just is. When you live in awareness instead of from the ego and all of the minds notions, you can actually feel your natural peace and joy that is within you. Go ahead and compete, if you are an athlete. Have fun, but do not become attached to winning and material objects, like ribbons and trophies. There will come a day when you will no longer be able to compete and if you have not wrapped your identity up into what you have won, your ribbons and trophies, then you will be at peace with yourself and not depressed and down because you are no longer on top and in the headlines and getting the recognition and praise that you once craved so much.  
Competing or Embracing & Accepting
The problem with competition is that it is hard to embrace others and be accepting of others, including ourselves, when we are constantly competing with one another over everything, such as over our perceived status in society, educational level, job position, material objects, relationships, etc. The more that you separate yourself off from others, the less you are Self-LESS, the less you are able to see the suffering of others, the less compassionate you are, the less chances there are that you will give to others or volunteer your time to help others and do so unconditionally, not to impress others, but to do what is right and do what your heart is telling you to do. The more you are embracing instead of competing, the more connected you are to others, which creates a wonderful feeling of joy and peace inside of you, that cannot be felt when you are competing.
Remain in Awareness
Watch your thoughts. Keep what’s real and throw out the rest. The less, unnecessary, weight that you have on your mind, the lighter you feel, and the easier life becomes. Do not ascribe meaning to the meaningless, value to the valueless. Remain in awareness at all times and when the ego pops its ugly head up, acknowledge it and release it. 
Habits that are engrained in us—over years and even decades—take time and practice to break. Go easy on yourself, let go of guilt, when you slip up, and remember:
Every Day is a New Day to Start Afresh, Every Moment is a New Moment to Start Anew.

Copyright © 2012 Pamela J. Wells. All Rights Reserved Image licensed under Bigstockphoto.com

Feel free to add a comment, if there is anything that you would like to add or any experiences that you would care to share.